


The Prince's Guide to Getting Karkat in the Water

by KarkatVantabulous



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Beach Day, Fluff, Karkat Swearing, M/M, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-22
Updated: 2016-11-22
Packaged: 2018-09-01 10:33:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8621086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KarkatVantabulous/pseuds/KarkatVantabulous
Summary: Sooner or later Karkat was going to spend some time in the water, Eridan was going to make sure he did.





	

"Aw come on Kar!" Eridan shouted from a good thirty feet away. Karkat glanced up at his matesprit before quickly glancing back down at his book. There was no way in hell he'd get into the water. "We came out here for a specific purpose and now you're ruinin' said purpose with your trashy literature!" Oh fuck no.

"The only thing trashy here, Eridan, is your choice in swim trunks! Sea horses? Really??" Eridan rolled his eyes and began making his way back to more shallow water. Sooner or later Karkat was going to spend _some_ time in the water, Eridan was going to make sure he did. Karkat glanced up at his dripping wet matesprit and sighed loudly, setting his book down. "What?"

"You're gettin' in the water." Karkat scoffed and in response, Eridan scooped the smaller troll up and held him bridal style. Karkat responded like any normal troll would, he started panicking. He flailed his arms and cursed at his matesprit who just hummed and calmly made his way to the water. The cancer troll saw the oncoming ocean and quickly moved from Eridan's arms to his back, now being carried on the sea dweller's back.

"Just you fucking wait. Once we get home I swear to fuck I will make you watch a every single Troll Will Smith movie ever created." Eridan hummed in amusement and continued walking towards the water. Karkat's fear of the ocean was a bit...adorable to Eridan. He didn't know why but it was. Maybe it was the sense of irony behind it? Karkat is terrified of the ocean and what it holds and yet he's in a flushed relationship with a _sea dweller._

Eridan took a step inside the water and Karkat tightened his grip on his matesprit. Eridan tried his very best to pat Karkat's leg in assurance as he took another step in. Two steps in and Karkat was fine now, his grip was relaxed and he didn't seem as frightened. Then Eridan walked in to where he was nearly waist deep in the salty water.

"Oh my god, oh my god Eridan I'm going to die. Oh fuck, oh man. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck. I'm going to fucking drown to death, I'll be turned into a Karkat stew for whatever carnivorous creature lies within the depths of this watery cemetery." The violet blooded troll rolled his eyes at his matesprit's little melodramatic rambling and pushed him up his back more. Luckily Karkat caught on to what Eridan was trying to do and climbed onto the sea dwellers shoulders, sitting comfortably and safely.

"Is that better you fuckin' wriggler?" Karkat hummed his approval and have Eridan the go ahead to continue walking. They got to the point where Eridan was now chest deep in water, by now Eridan was attempting to coax Karkat off his shoulders. "Come on Kar. It's just water. It ain't gonna fuckin' hurt ya, you fuckin' drink this shit all the time! Ya take baths in it! What's the glubbin' difference this time?"

"The "glubbing" difference this time is that I have to worry about giant sea lusii attacking me of a giant marine animal seeing me as tasty snack and taking a motherfucking bite out of my leg or some deranged sea dweller yanking me by my legs down into the depths of this watery hell. At least in my ablution trap the only think I need to worry about there is whether or not my quack-beast toy is functioning properly!" Karkat gripped Eridan's horns tightly, he was terrified in all honesty. What if Eridan dropped him and he floated away and drowned? What if a sea dweller really did try to take him? Oh god. Thinking of this only made him panic even more

"Kar you're bein" unreasonable. Ain't no one's gonna take my matesprit without me shootin' them with Ahab, no lusii will suddenly attack you and all hostile sea swelling life live in the bottom of the fuckin' ocean now quit your blubberin' and get offa my shoulders so you can fully experience this water and this beach day experience." Karkat huffed and stayed up, he wasn't going down that easy. "Karkat fuckin' Vantas i'm warnin' ya."

"Oh fuck off Eridan. You can't do anything, you're princely manner of handling shit won't work on me so you can tuck your cape between your legs and move along." Eridan grumbled. Karkat never really did fall for his "Royal" tone of voice. Looks like he'd have to try a different approach. 

"C'mon Kar, we can recreate one a those scenes from your sort of okay romcoms. It'll be romantic." Karkat pondered the offer, knowing fully well that Eridan was just saying this to get him down but _fuck_ , it was a great offer. Begrudgingly the troll, with the help of his sea dweller matesprit, climbed down and stood in the water. The water was just above Karkat's chin and Eridan found that absolutely adorable. His short little matesprit was clinging onto his hand and practically submerged under the water, it was too much for him.

"Okay I know what you're thinking so I just want to say fuck you." Eridan held his hands up defensively and chuckled.

"You ain't Vris, I'm fairly certain ya don't know shit about what I'm thinkin' or what goes on in my thinkpan." The smaller troll scoffed and crossed his arms under the water. "But if you aren't just spewing shit then you must know what I'm about to do next." Karkat scoffed again.

"Of course I fucking do. And not because I'm some sort of mind reading freak or whatever the fuck it is that spider loving bitch does." The smaller troll tried his best to stand up on his tip toes, which was difficult due to how the waves were trying to throw him off his balance but he managed and wrapped his arms around Eridan's shoulders. "I know it because we've been together for approximately one solar sweep and I always know what's going on in your seaweed infested thinkpan." Eridan smiled and pressed their foreheads together, taking both himself and Karkat a favour and lifting the smaller up slightly.

"Really? Then ya know that you're constantly in my thoughts?" Karkat hummed in response and leaned to press a sweet kiss to Eridan's lips.


End file.
